i am fully convinced that i am nocturnal.

my brain is so AWAKE at odd hours of the night. i didn't sleep until 6AM, the early light was so comforting. i felt simple again.
i dreamed that i was going to prom. my mother was crying. i couldn't remember my date's name and he was running late. i was convinced i was going to be stood up. i was eating cake out of a pan. then he showed up in a sketchy van with a few other questionable teens and i happily got in. i left my dress and phone in the van. at some point during the dream i used a pay phone.

this is what it means:
an end to something and the beginning of something else
illness or affliction
craving shelter, comfort, guidance and protection
fear of change and your ambivalence about seizing an opportunity
unready, unworthy, or unsupported in your current circumstances
overwhelmed or conflicted with decisions about your future
time is running out and that you do not have time to accomplish all the things you want
missed and lost opportunities
the load that you are carrying and what you can handle
confront issues which you have tried to avoid



did you know i think of you when i write these blogs? i wonder how you feel when you read them.